The Blame Game

Do you play the 'Blame game'?  

Jessi is a dieter who is becoming an intuitive eater. She decided to have a healthy snack and opened a bag of carrots. She took a bite and the carrot tasted strange. The inside of her mouth felt tingly, even fuzzy. Jessi ignored her senses and decided it was her fault for buying the carrots in a bag instead of fresh. Because she 'knew' that carrots were 'good', Jessi assumed she was 'bad' and the source of the problem.

Her mouth was practically screaming that the carrots were unhealthy. But the diet mentality is to blame yourself and ignore your body, and so she did.  She ate 5 carrots and then grabbed a cupcake to get the taste out of her mouth. No one wins the blame game.

When you play the blame game you stop noticing what you notice with your senses. Ignoring your senses betrays your inner dignity. This feels really awful. 

  

Forcing your body to eat what it rejects is not intuitive.  

Eating intuitively is to respond to your body. 

As soon as you respond to your body, you are in control. 

That's all it takes!

Jessi is learning to notice messages from her senses. Her tastebuds told her the carrots were bad. But the habit of diet programs told her she was bad. This blame game had become her habit. Once Jessi realized it was a habit and that she could take control, she felt like a different person. 

Notice what you notice. Habits are hard to break. But self-defeating habits are worth breaking. It is never intuitive to 'blame' yourself. The intuitive choice is to look for options when your senses give you a heads up.

The Myth of Self-Control

Change happens inside us. 

'Self-control' imposed by ideas or rules can feel like a threat to your body. Feeling threatened puts your body in the survival mode. 

Your body :

              - is genetically programmed for survival. It can force you to eat, breathe or sleep to survive. 

              - will be fat any time it decides that being fat is the best way to keep you safe. 

              - decides how much you weigh, not your conscience or a book you read. 

That's why self-control is a myth. Since our body controls itself, it has complete control over how fast we burn fat. Because it's intuitive to protect and empower your body, trusting your intuition keeps your body feeling safe. 

Tune in with your senses and notice what you notice. Your 6th sense will kick in to enhance your observations and what is right to eat to be your healthy shape will be automatic.

Intuitive eating feels like self respect. Your body relaxes, you enjoy eating and the pounds fall off! That's what's happening with people doing my IntuEating program right now! It's easy to talk about, but letting go of self-control is a challenge when you are used to dieting. Be patient with yourself.

Begin this way:

            - Nourish your body every day by only eating what you really want.

            - Listen with your senses to your heart and body.

            - Visualize your healthy fit body, exactly the way you want to look and feel before you get out of bed in the morning and before every meal. Feed that body.

When you force yourself to lose weight, you are violating your bodies natural laws and it rebels by holding on to fat. The real path for self-control is to connect with yourself using dignity and your senses to be clear about what feels right. Take a deep breath and realize that your body is talking to you.

Listen to your body and trust yourself.

Enhancing Your Sex Life with Food

Intuition is our 6th sense. Right now you are reading this but of course you are not thinking about using your eyes!  We use our senses automatically.  Right now - you are using your intuition.

The more you notice what you see, taste, smell, hear and touch, the more aware you will be of your sensuality and your intuition. The essence of great sex is great sensuality. When we really taste, touch and smell our food, arousal is heightened. Turning a meal into a sensual experience is intuitive eating.

In the film "Tom Jones" Albert Finney licks chicken bones and Joyce Redman looks like she's making love to an apple. What makes this scene really 'hot' is that the entire time these 2 eat, they give each other eye contact. Eye contact while we're eating can feel incredibly intimate.

When entering a bakery and inhaling the sweet aroma, or biting into a favorite meal- the sounds we make are "o-oh", "m-mm", "ahh".  Those are also the sounds of happy sex. Just like eye contact, amelling, tasting and listening can become suddenly intimate when we're eating.

When you want to enhance your sex life, notice little noises aroused by the pleasures of eating. You might lick your lips and let your tongue poke and taste your food. Chewing well not only helps us eat slower, digest better and manage our weight- it also connects us with pleasures of eating.

The 6th sense is our arousal sense. It takes what our 5 senses experience and pushes it up a notch so the experience is heightened.

Mixing pleasures of the senses with pleasures of the heart and mind is the kind of pleasure that is the difference between flying first class or coach. Sure we get there either way, but the difference is the quality of the trip and the ultimate pleasure of our ride.

Intuitive eaters choose food that satisfies hunger by pleasing the senses. Staying in touch with your senses keeps us in touch with your body. You won't over eat, other things will be on your mind.

Get helpful tips for intuitive eating. Download Am I Really Hungry? 6th Sense Diet : Intuitive Eating

This week I'll be on these shows talking about eating and sensuality.

The Mancow Muller Show    Improving your Sex Life With Food
Morning Madness Talk Radio
www.talkradioinsiders.com
3. 15. 2011

NY NonStop, All Night with Joey  Tuning, Diet, Sex and Intuition

NYNBC, WNBC TV

3. 16. 2011

Morning Show    Turning a Meal into a Sensual Experience
92.9 The Big Cheese
WECL Eau Claire, WI
3. 16. 2011

The Eating Challenge, Take 2

Intuitive eating is knowing that what you need for energy and health is what you want to eat. It takes courage to maintain your intuitive connection through challenging eating situations.

You may need to eat bread with your meal, or protein, or you may just feel like having yogurt. You may decide that you had such a big lunch that you will just have an appetizer for dinner. Sounds simple, but it takes courage. Courage is when you recognize what you know, and you respect who you are. Courage is following through with what you know and doing what you respect.

Words make it sound easy, sure. Doing what sounds easy just may surprise you. The real eating challenge is to trust yourself to be good to yourself. 

Challenging eating situations happen every day. We feel tempted or starved, or like there is no choice, or like pleasing others. The challenge to be true to physical needs, while feeling pressure from stress or from exhaustion is often the result of not trusting what you intuitively know your body needs.

Take the eating challenge and observe yourself around food. Use your eyes, your ears, taste, touch and smell. Notice messages from your stomach and notice how you feel in your heart and your head. Fine tune your senses. Listen to your intuition, and recognize habits that end up making you feel badly about your self. When it is time to eat, use your senses to smell, taste and see what you are eating and think about how your body feels and what you want for your self. Give your self a chance.

Intuition is a kind of natural courage. Connect with your intuition, and eat only what you know and feel is right. When you tune into your body, and your hunger with courage, you start to recognize your eating needs. Then you trust your self and take control of feeding your hunger. This is not easy because it's probably not something that you thought about before. So, give yourself a chance to think. Take a deep breathe in and now breathe out really, really slowly until there is nothing inside. Good.

It takes courage to recognize and trust your self.

It takes courage to stand up for your self.

It takes courage do what is right.

It takes courage to acknowledge what you need.

It takes courage to recognize habits, but if you don’t, you will never be happy with your weight. Ignoring your senses, your body, and what you know, creates a vicious cycle when you eat, and all it takes to stop, is connecting with the courage to follow your truth.  Ah yes, that is the eating challenge.

 

If Your Body Could Talk - an exercise

Trash talking your body makes it shut down. 

Eating intuitively keeps an open honest connection with your body.

What would you do if your body could talk?

This 2 part exercise is powerful. It helps for losing weight , and importantly, this is good for putting your head back on track with your heart.   Doing the exercise opens up a different way of trusting your body/mind intuitive connection. Try it. Let us know what happens.

1. On a blank sheet of paper write a letter to your body: 

Start with Dear Body. Take a breath and tell your body whatever you want. Be patient, and let the words stream. No one will read this but you.

2. Give your body a chance to reply. On another sheet of paper, use pencil and write yourself a letter from your body to you:

Use your other (non-dominant) hand. Start with Dear and your name. Take a breath and start writing.  If your body could talk what would it tell you?

Using your non-dominant hand forces you to connect differently with your body. I ended up printing.  It will take effort to use your other hand and be hard to read but, do it and see what happens. 

In an eating situation where you feel emotional or pressured to act, you may find that you stop listening to the intuitive connection with your body. Stress can put you in a self-destructive place where you are mean to your body. When you're in an eating environment that pushes your buttons, take and breath and use your senses to connect with yourself. Give your body a voice.

It takes effort to remain open. This exercise is worth the effort. I saved it and found reading what I wrote the next day moving.

You will discover it's intuitive to be kind to yourself. Intuition is subtle in the beginning. Write yourself a letter from your body and feel the connection.

The 3 Minute Rule

Sometime an unhealthy food craving can be nearly overpowering. Overcoming it happens when you use the 3 minute rule. You will discover that ignoring the feeling by really focusing on being patient and kind with yourself for 3 full minutes totally puts you in power.

Take control of what's eating you by using the 3 minutes rule to get through difficult emotional moments and challenging personal situations. It's called "Doing the Intuitive Pause".
         
            1. Stop yourself from being mentally manipulated.
            Ignore the craving by focusing on being kind and patient with yourself for 3 minutes. Tune in to your body's needs and your state of mind. It's intuitive to respect your body by remembering your physical priorities.

            2. Notice your attitude towards yourself.
            Don't compromise who you are because you're angry, frustrated, lonely, stressed or bored. Instead, find something besides food to make you feel better.

            3. Use all of your senses to notice what's triggering your appetite.
            This includes using common sense to notice what's impacting you outside of your body. Common sense is the intuitive way of being alert.

            4. Decide how you will feel about yourself if you eat what you're craving. If you won't be happy with yourself an hour later, it's not physical hunger.
         
            5. If you recognize the food craving is from your body, then enjoy eating it by noticing how satisfied your body feels while you're eating. It's intuitive to enjoy eating. In fact, you get 70% more nutrition from food when you enjoy it!

Being patient: gives you the opportunity to be clear about your values. 

Being kind: means you're allowed to do what feels healthiest long term for you.

Intuitive eating puts you in control because you make the rules. 

Your really do know what's right for you.

Since your survival instinct won't let you starve and your metabolism rate works with your body and genetics are real, dieting can only be a temporary fix. The way to achieve long term body health success is to take control of your eating by trusting your intuition.  

3 minutes can change everything

Give yourself 3 minutes and take control of your eating.

Then move on with healthy eating and trash the craving.

Your intuition connects the dots in your Life so you stay connected to what matters in the big picture.

As you take action by eating intuitively, there is no more overeating and you lose weight for good. 

Your relationship food and with your body will never be the same. 

Tips for Intuitive eating:

Start today by eating only when you are physically hungry.
Use your senses to notice what's triggering your appetite.
Decide if you will feel good about yourself afterward - before you eat.
If you feel yourself craving what you will later regret- use the 3 minute rule.

The purpose of eating is to create the foundation for the rest of your Life.
Don't deprive yourself.
Eat for long term strength, health, and contentment.
And be sure to taste and enjoy what you eat.

:)

Good Carbs!?!?!?!

I like carbs. Sometimes I crave them and sometimes I crave protein. It's intuitive to crave a variety of foods. Intuitive eaters are curious to see what different eating options provide. Intuitive eating is open options. There are no rules, just tools.

I read a blog this morning about reasons carbs help you lose weight and was struck by the missing information. Immediately I connected with a power tool of intuitive eating, curiosity. Curiosity is like having x-ray vision and super hearing because it is looking closer and hearing more. This flexible open attitude is used by intuitive eaters to stay aware, in control of their weight.

Balanced eating makes sense intuitively because different organs in your body have different needs. Of course, before you eat, it's critical to check in with your body with your senses and intuition to feel if you have a craving for protein. If you do, and you want to slim down, don't combine the protein with a starch.  The reason is that when you eat a "resistant starch" alone, your body will convert that starch to a protein. But, if you mix these carbs with protein, your body will not need the carb as a protein and will convert it to a fattening starch.  

For ex: You can enjoy spaghetti with garlic and oil, or with a tomato sauce and your body will digest it as a protein. As soon as you add meat to the spaghetti, your body will digest it as a starch.

Sometimes when you feel a need for carbs, the ones called "Resistant Starches" can bring a satisfying slimming meal, especially if you have it with a light salad. Resistant starches include: bananas, oatmeal, white beans, black beans, lentils, potatoes, plantains, garbanzo beans, pearl barley, whole wheat or semolina pasta, and brown rice. 

A good carb breakfast is oatmeal, with bananas in it for sweetness, and a handful of walnuts for  your brain. Yep, walnuts, which look like tiny brains (!), are good for enhancing your brain power. I learned that using curiosity. Being curious is your intuitive way of staying aware. 

Rice and beans combined (no meat added) create a perfect protein and a satisfying slimming meal. ttp://www.whfoods.com/genpage.php?tname=foodspice&dbid=2

Don't believe everything you read. To enjoy eating and stay in control, be curious about what you eat and how your body feels at mealtime. That's intuitive eating.

To learn more about your intuitive tools read: Am I Really Hungry? 6th Sense Diet : Intuitive Eating.

Get Sensual.

Intuitive eating includes being aware of sensations like hunger and fullness. It is intuitive to use your mind to notice how your body feels. 

Recognize how your body feels by using your 5 senses: taste, touch, smell, sight and hearing. 

Being sensual keeps you in touch with what matters. 

Your 5 senses tune you in to your body and the intuitive tools guide you to re-connect with self control around eating.  (http://www.IntuEating.com)

How the senses work:  

>The job of your senses is to give you pleasure and protection.

>When you use your senses, you are giving yourself every advantage they offer. 

>When you take them for granted, you ignore them and miss opportunities to protect yourself from  over eating.

You will discover that using your eyes when you eat keeps you more tuned in to how much you're eating.  Being aware of tastes, textures, smells and at the same time of being aware of how your body feels keeps you clearer about eating choices. It's the natural mind/body connection of your intuition. 

Be sensual. Changing from the habit of ignoring your senses to noticing what you notice will help you shed pounds. When you connect with your intuition, and use your 5 senses, you connect with your body.

Using your senses- sight, taste, touch, smell, hearing and your intuition 

complete the mind/body connection you need to make choices that protect you and

keep you eating healthy.

As you use your senses, start trusting what you notice to make your eating choices.
You know what you want for yourself.
You have learned from experience portions that feel good to your body.

Connecting with your body when you eat is a way of respecting yourself. It's the way to give yourself the chance you deserve to be healthy and happy. 

Intuitive eating is how to be clear about what's important for you. It is making eating choices that make sense and  feel good to you emotionally and physically. The only way to predict your future is to create it. By eating intuitively you create the body you want.

Guilt and Stress

Guilt around eating is motivated by a short term perspective and it creates unhealthy stress that leads to binging.

Guilt around eating is not part of intuitive eating. Guilt is a short-sighted 5 letter word. Binging is a self-destructive temper tantrum. Anything that motivates you to abuse yourself is not intuitive. 

 A habit of dieting is to think about eating foods as "good" or "bad". This creates guilt and stress. Try to let go of that. Instead, think of eating intuitively, as satisfying or comforting. Use your senses, including common sense and eat to feel good. Intuitive eaters eat what they want. When they slip, intuitive eaters get back on track because they are motivated to look and feel good. 


It is natural to learn from eating experiences. There is no magic mirror of approval when it comes to your body. Measuring progress at every meal creates emotional stress and misses the bigger picture. What you eat is the foundation for the rest of your life. Every meal is a step along your path. Nobody walks a straight path because stuff happens. 

Intuitive eating is a long-term perspective because your body is constantly changing. It's intuitive to see the bigger picture instead of judging every meal. Eating is about nourishment. Life is a do-it-yourself project. You can adjust, correct, and not-repeat choices. You are in control. Your body will be the result of choices you make today. Decide to eat what looks and feels good.


This is a new year and a time of new beginnings. Respecting yourself is a combination of trust and honor. Now is a perfect time to respect your self. Really trust your heart, body, mind, and six senses to protect you and let that self-respect honor and guide your eating choices.

2011/ Momentum

A New Year's resolution it is a commitment you make to yourself with inner courage for back bone, and Faith in what's right as your guide. This is the year to become an intuitive eater. 

A New Year's resolution is you taking control of your Life. 

Intuitive eating is you taking control of your eating.
  
Transforming from a mindset of 'dieting' to being an intuitive eater is a resolution that will serve you for the rest of you Life. This time next year you can be more comfortable around foods that tempt you, and happier with your body. 
Making a resolution creates momentum. 

At a party last night I did the 'intuitive pause' and used my senses look and listen. I was grateful to see abundant food and hear good cheer and people making New Year's resolutions. Energy in the room was enthusiastic, promising and positive. 2011 will be a year of seeing things differently. It will be a year to be less critical of yourself and more open to your potential. That's exciting.

More and more people are reaching out to learn about intuitive eating. I am finding myself in demand to speak, coach individuals and lead groups to maintain their healthy weight. A recent podcast, http://patrickwanis.com/RadioInterviews.asp#IntuitiveEating has helped spread the word. 

IntuEating.com is a new site set up for you to use to keep up the momentum with some concrete help as you use your intuition to lose weight , or to just maintain your weight. Yo-yo dieting is so last year.

 

May the sparkle of the New Year find you with good health, happiness, success, satisfaction and enthusiasm...

and if you're still working on all of that-

Wishing you sureness of purpose, balance between what you want and what you need, an open mind and brave spirit guiding you to fulfill your  dreams in 2011.

 

Intuitive Self-Defense

Everywhere I go people are baking or eating sweets. It's that party time of the year. This is when intuitive eaters use self-defense to tune in to their senses and bodies and take control of their eating. When you eat at a party, your choices are personal and they will be the ones you live with after the holidays.

Using foresight is

looking ahead at the consequences of what you're about to do. 

Foresight is your intuitive way of seeing the long term picture. The intuitive eater looks at a plate of cookies and thinks, "If I eat a handful of these now, how will if feel in an hour?" The answer is 'not good'. The intuitive solution is to enjoy a cookie and move far away from the plate to socialize.
         The long term benefit of this solution is you feel good about your choice because you took control, it was right for you, and your body feels good too.

       

For intuitive eaters  enjoying a cookie is part of enjoying the whole party.

For dieters who feel deprived, the plate of cookies is a destination.

Don't get stuck at a plate of sweets. Use foresight.

          Acid reflux is an uncomfortable condition where stomach acids end up in the esophagus. It can be caused by over eating. When you overeat your stomach expands and the muscle at the top that usually stays shut, stretches open. Yuck. Another cause can be drinking alcohol in quantities or combinations that don't work for your body. You can avoid this uncomfortable condition by using foresight with your senses. Use intuitive self-defense to stay tuned in to your body.

Foresight is your natural intuitive self-defense. 

Use it with your 5 senses to keep clear about the present, 

so that you stay real and make eating choices that work with your body long term.

It's great that you are choosing to take control of your eating choices. Use foresight with your senses to realize the long term impact on your body of overeating or over-drinking. 

And now, relax and enjoy the party season!

The 15 Minute Solution

Cravings and Candy

December is a time of heightened cravings. Family and friends ask, what do you want? We feel this emotionally, physically, and socially. When teased with holiday deserts, we see food not only with our eyes, but also with our hearts.

I was asked, "How can we connect with our intuition to know the difference between intuitive eating and 'unhealthy' cravings?"  

Intuitive eating feels good an hour later. 

'Unhealthy' cravings feel bad an hour later.

Intuitive eating balances what you crave with what you need to eat. Eating a square of chocolate because it makes you feel good and you like the way it tastes, is healthy. Chocolate is an anti-oxident. The body uses anti oxidents help to clean pollution from your system. Your body is intuitively efficient. Craving to eat something can mean that your body needs it. Intuitive eating is working with your body.

       When you eat one square of chocolate, it takes a full 15 minutes for your brain to know that your stomach has had happy piece of chocolate. This means, after eating one square of chocolate, take 15 minutes to socialize or even relax, to give your head time it needs to know if you still are physically craving chocolate.  Try it, and you will be surprised. 

Your body, just like your mind and and your heart, has a process it uses to be the best you can be. 

 -Respect and connect with your stomach by taking the harmless temptation of craving seriously. 

-Guide yourself intuitively by staying clear about what matters to you in the long run. 

     While you may crave candy, I bet you crave affection more. Overeating ignores your body and isolates you from others because you are not responding to what you really want. Your social needs, emotional needs, and physical needs are equally important.

Intuition connects with your point of balance so you know what you want. 

Balance is the secret of self control.

Unhealthy cravings lead to self-defeating behavior that feels bad. We all have an inner baby that manipulates us with impatience, self-pity, anger or doubt. Don't be bullied by 'unhealthy' cravings. 

Do your best for you.

Use the 15 minute rule before you go for more. 

During your 15 minutes, imagine how you feel when you take control of your choices, 

and with an open mind, stay clear about what matters to you. 

Trust your process. 

Intuitively you know what will make you feel good.

Wanting the love.

Everybody knows "food is love." Everybody intuitively wants love. That's why, at a celebration, where food is abundant, it's common to overeat. 

It's not surprising at Thanksgiving, a holiday of appreciation and feasting, to discover that you feel stuffed, instead of comfortably full. Maybe the sweet potatoes with marsh mellows were better than you remembered, and the vision, you intended, of portion control didn't work. Stuff happens, and it's okay. What really matters, is that you are aware of what happened that didn't make you feel good about your self, and that you commit to be kinder to your self next time. 

Don't beat yourself up. 

It is intuitive to forgive your self, because forgiving your self is a sign of self respect. Doing this will help you automatically be more prudent about eating choices over the rest of the holiday season. It is human nature to fall down, and it is intuitive to get back up and to keep going.

Because intuitive eating is having a flexible approach, post Thanksgiving is the time to cut your self a little slack. At holiday meals, the natural focus is on socializing. However, your intuition still is there. You are changing the way you want to maintain your optimum weight. Since you've already started being aware of your body, and of messages from your 6 senses, intuition is automatically part of  your food choices.

Intuitively: You take control of your eating by staying connected to what is really important to you, which is the way you feel, and the way you look.

Intuition is not something that you force on your self. Instead intuitive eating is a way of trusting your self to eat what's in your best interest for your optimum health - even when you're "socializing."

Stay committed to intuitive eating by choosing to forgive a holiday slip up, and try to maintain more vigilance the next time spirits are merry. Everything worth achieving takes time and effort - including getting the habit of being an intuitive eater.

Enjoy the holiday and enjoy eating. You deserve the love.<3

 

Party with the present.

Parties can be scary when they dredge up emotional memories. Parties can be fun and an opportunity to re-invent yourself, when you stay in the present.

Fear around eating is about the past. Intuition is about the present. During the holiday season, it's tempting to dwell in the emotional past. Use self-respect to avoid the temptation.

Fear is emotional sabotage that leads to self defeating choices. It is an emotional bully that makes you ignore your senses, common sense and your heart! The result is you feel 'out of sync' with yourself and may gorge at a party, or privately eat a loaf of bread.

• When you get that 'out of sync' feeling, reconnect with the present by using your senses to reconnect with what's real around you. Notice what you notice.
• Be honest with yourself about what's important to you and trust your intuition to stay clear about your personal priorities and values.
•  Allow yourself to feel dignified.

When you connect with your intuition, there is nothing to doubt. It is as real as your eyes reading this. When you are at a party, don't re-live your past, instead, connect with self-respect to protect and be good to who you are. Every effort you make, to be the best you can be, is important and admirable. :)

Being honest with yourself is what makes intuitive eating easy. 
It's honest to recognize fear is an emotion that has nothing to do with your appetite.

Stay true to you and stay 'in sync' with your body. 

Party with the present. 

The past is history. 

When you respect yourself, you protect yourself.  
Make a promise to do that.